Well, Crap.

Today was a rough day. We went to the Cancer Center this afternoon as usual for Tony's treatment. When he came out to meet me after his treatment, he told me they had to "re-scan" him in the CT area due to his weight loss. They've started weighing him daily because he has lost so much weight and his radiation mask doesn't fit the way it did when it was first molded. This, then, affects where the radiation is directed, so they have to keep a close eye on things.

We kind of thought the "re-scan" was just par for the course, but while he was in the CT area, his radiation oncologist came to talk to me. When she started by saying "OK, here's the deal...", I can't say I was too cheerful. She explained that when they first scanned Tony for radiation treatments, they formulated the different areas or "planes" where the radiation would be directed. However, due to Tony's weight loss, they had to scan him again today. The problem is that the prior plan for his radiation planes and the re-scan they did today weren't meshing too well. In particular, he seems to have lost a lot of weight in his face and neck, which is messing with the plane of radiation near his spinal cord. Not cool. This means we have basically two options: 1) He gains weight and they continue with the existing plan or 2) He doesn't gain weight and they have to re-formulate the plan (remember all that complicated computer mapping?), which would take 5-7 days, which would mean delaying his remaining treatments. While that might sound like a nice thing, with this type of cancer it is NOT a nice thing. It gives it a chance to grow back.

The doctor then told me that she wanted us to consider a feeding tube, since I have been twisting Tony's arm to drink 4 nutritional supplement shakes a day, and to gain weight he needs to drink more like 8-10 each day. I knew he would not be happy about this. Heck, I wasn't happy about it. But the doctor said we reeeeeally needed to pack some calories in him, either by him drinking or by way of a feeding tube. If we couldn't do this, it would mean the delay in treatment, which is - as I mentioned - very bad. Oh, and we pretty much had to let them know by tomorrow morning if we needed the feeding tube because it takes a while to schedule the procedure. (Sigh). After she left, I sat in the waiting area and cried a bit - after all, I thought we had dodged the whole feeding tube bullet.

So when Tony came out, the doctor repeated the whole explanation to him, and he (rather vehemently) said that he was NOT going to have a feeding tube this close to the end of treatment. We explained/encouraged/admonished him that this meant he would have to drink 8-10 shakes a day, and he said that he would try. When we got home, I heard Tony scurrying around in the kitchen, and I thought he was doing "angry cleaning." (That's what both of us do when we're upset...you know, to take our minds off things.) But then he came in the living room and announced that he had a present for me, and that I should go in the kitchen. When I did, I saw six (yes, SIX) empty shake bottles. My mouth dropped open and I said, "Did you pour them out?!" He replied, "Nope. I drank 'em."

Wow. He had already had two shakes earlier that day. So eight "Fortify" shakes (that's Kroger brand Ensure...hehe) = 2800 calories and 104 grams of protein. I don't know how he didn't puke.

Just goes to show you what a little determination (or should I say stubbornness?) can do. Needless to say, he will be spacing them out a little from now on.

Also needless to say, we appreciate your continued prayers. Today was pretty rough, and this last bit of treatment is very rough for Tony. Trying to drink that much every day is hard. Also, since we are near the end of treatment, our thoughts have turned to what happens next. The doctors have told us that when he is done with radiation and chemo, they will wait about six weeks and do a CT scan. This will tell us how the treatment has affected the tumor area and lymph nodes, and if we are in the clear (remission!) or not. I don't even want to think about the "or not" part. I can't really think about that option right now. So please continue to pray! We appreciate everyone's kindness and prayers...we'll keep you updated.